Bottling up emotions is A Bad Plan.
Ok, guys, let’s talk— even though our upbringing taught us NOT to talk, especially not talking about our feelings. (I also love working with women, but men need more prodding.)
If I were to offer you the phone pictured here as part of a cell phone plan, you’d quickly shop elsewhere. Retro is only cool when it IS cool. This mammoth phone is not cool.
Bottling up our emotions is like using this ridiculous mobile phone, which is impractical, clunky, and outdated. If you were to hold this thing for hours, it would harm your health – as harmful as keeping your feelings ziplocked inside you.
There must be another way. Join the ranks of men who face and process their emotions – the modern way to relate and communicate.
Men, let’s talk about WORK!
I offer you legit therapy, not some antiquated, irrelevant promise of success or outdated method. If you want solid joy and contentment and not fleeting dopamine rushes, you must work for it.
We are most adept at talking about our work. But let’s talk about the work of counseling.
What doesn’t work (on your own, without a counselor)?
Spending hours online in mindless information gathering, fact-checking, or porn-looking gets you nowhere.
Ignoring the deep-seated angst by staying busier, longer at work, and further away from your key relationships fails to make things better.
Living vicariously through some athlete, rock star, actor, financial mogul, preacher, author, or Marvel hero does nothing for your sense of self.
Going through the motions, trying harder to love your partner, doing religion, faking engagement at work, and half-listening to your kids is not a way to build relationships with yourself or others.
What does work?
Processing through the SARS (Shame, Anger, Regret, and Sadness) behind most of the escapes mentioned above does work.
You have done some horrible things. Is there any hope for release from all the shame?
Feeling angry while either bottling up those feelings or exploding in front of others only makes you feel more pissed off, like most men who do the same.
If only you could live that part of your life over again. Why can’t you get a do-over? Sometimes the regrets are overwhelming. It may seem like a whole lifetime of remorse.
Then there’s the empty, lonely, deep-down, ugh feeling. That feeling is beyond words, resulting in a deep ache of dread, unhappiness, and sadness.
If you are a man desiring deeper faith, then finding ways to revitalize your connection with God will work.
It’s time to let it all out!
Therapy with me is the right place to let slip the expletives you readily yell during your commute.
It’s time to steer that angst toward dealing with the shame, resentment, and losses of your life. Venting rage at the driver in front of you is misdirected. It’s not about them; it’s about your accumulated, pent up emotions.
I have witnessed a change in many men’s lives as they finally reach into and emerge from the deepest pains of their lives to find comfort and healing. This change, in turn, produces hope and a new lease on life. You can have a new outlook, too.
If anything here grabs you, then grab your phone and get in touch with me today.